Romance scams are the cruelest scams we track, because they weaponize genuine human connection. Victims aren't foolish — they're targeted by professionals who run dozens of relationships at once, following scripts refined over years.
The pattern is remarkably consistent, which is exactly why software can catch it even when a person in love can't.
The playbook
Stage 1 — The approach. A match on a dating app or an unsolicited DM. The profile is attractive, successful, and usually works somewhere that explains why they can't meet: an oil rig, a military deployment, an overseas contract.
Stage 2 — The rush. Within days they're calling you their soulmate. This is called love bombing, and it's deliberate: intense emotion short-circuits skepticism.
Stage 3 — The move off-platform. They push to switch to WhatsApp or Telegram quickly, because dating apps scan for scam language and ban accounts.
Stage 4 — The crisis. A frozen bank account, a customs fee, a medical emergency, a can't-miss crypto opportunity. The first request is often small. It never stays small.
The tells
They can never video call. They're always overseas or about to travel. Money requests come with elaborate stories and reasons you can't use normal payment methods — they want wire transfers, gift cards, or crypto. And they discourage you from telling friends and family, because outside perspective is the scam's biggest threat.
If any conversation has reached the money stage, paste a few of their messages into Scambook. Our database recognizes romance scam scripts because thousands of users have checked nearly identical messages — the same scripts get reused on victim after victim.